Dating and Relationships

I must have read this 10 times already! This post really hits the nail on the head!!!

Answers to All your Adult Dating Questions

One of the most recurring mental blocks men face before they date is their eagerness to plunge into a deep, stable and unbreakable relationship. We must realize that men and women think, act and decide differently. Women thoroughly relish the long swelling waves of romancing that go up and down in their minds. They feel completely absorbed, engulfed and rejuvenated while going through the rigmarole of emotional upheavals. On the contrary, men like less drama, less of emotional splurge and more of stability, sailing in tranquility of a rock-steady relationship.

What is the result of this mismatch of perspectives? You rush in and latch on to the woman of your life – as if there is no tomorrow – and the woman is viewing it totally differently. She visualizes pain before pleasure. Spends time thinking of what holds in future, thereby neglecting how she can hold on to the present…

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The Magical Coins

I found this post on a great poster’s site; CrankyCaregiver. I couldn’t figure out how to re-blog so I just copied the link to be able to share with all my readers :).  This is one of the most moving videos I have seen in quite some time. Thanks again  CrankyCaregiver for sharing.

P.S. I showed this video to several coworkers and there were tears involved 🙂

Versatile Blogger Award

Today I was given the pleasant surprise which is that of a nomination for the Versatile Blogger Award. I feel so honored. This is definitely a great way to start my weekend :).

I was nominated by a very inspirational blogger who goes by the name of You’re Just a Dumbass. I find her posts extremely interesting. Some of us guys could learn a lot on You’re Just a Dumbass‘ blog. It’s just a matter of opening your mind a bit so you may learn from other’s life experience. Thanks for nominating me You’re Just a Dumbass!!

Here are the VBA rules.

Here are my 15 nominees! These are all excellent bloggers in my book!!


Getting Single

Are You On Drugs?

Ine Therese Back Iversen

Hi, My Name is Brooke…

Lesbian sex tips for str8 boys

Kali Troxell

She Dances in the Rain


The Ratchet Review


Diamonds and Dirt

Photography Art Plus

Aisling Jennings Photography


My seven things:

1. Speaking of seven…Just watched 7 Psychopaths and LOVED it!

2. I love going to church even though I am not a crazy fanatic…

3. My favorite time of day is 4:20 (wink wink)

4. I was born in Los Angeles CA and raised in Costa Rica Central America

5. To me there is nothing better than enjoying the original Dumbo with my 4 yr old son.

6. I really like my job!

7. I am a very sociable person 🙂


Is it too good to be true?

A few weeks ago I wrote about how we don’t know what we have til its gone. If you missed it you can click here. I was writing about my own experience of the few that I have let get away. Today I got a facebook private message from an ex girlfriend,

This is not any ex girlfriend. This is that person that when I am asked if my heart was ever broken, her face is projected to my mental big screen. She is the only woman that ripped in to itty bitty pieces got my full heart. Plaques with her name on them can be found all over the wall that was shortly erected around my heart. Mind you I went through a 7 year marriage sometime after and not even then were the walls of Mordor my heart ever fully breached.

So back to the message…We have been talking on and off via facebook for about 3 years now. Just your casual “Hi there! I hope all is well in your life!”. Today’s message started off with “I really need to tell you something!!”, She begins to tell me that she went to a hypnotherapist to dig into her past to find out why she kept shutting out all amorous relationships. It turns out my name was the topic of conversation. Apparently deep down in her sub conscience she feels I am the love of her life that got away. She apologized at LENGTH and told me that no one has ever treated her like I did but that she just thought it was too good to be true. This wont ever help the damage that has already been done to my heart but it does serve as a life lesson. I know the popular saying is “If it’s too good to be true it probably isn’t true!”, I want to challenge all my readers to not walk the beaten path of “It’s not true”, Give things a try with an objective and positive mind. You never know what you might be missing out on. After all YOLO you only live once!!!


Issues with my Name


“Boys are straight up and down and girls are round all around”

This phrase has stuck in my mind since the very first day I heard it. What this is referring to is the difference in spelling of a seemingly feminine name.

Before we get into name calling I want to briefly explain a bit of family history. My great grandma was one of the original settlers of California. Her and her father walked up from Mexico to settle-in in California. Like many Mexican American families living in the US the Latin heritage was slowly lost. First thing to go is the native language. Next thing to go is the sense of brotherhood. My family had become what I like to refer to as “whitewashed”.

To be assimilated into the N.A society, forgetting your own language and culture and tries to act like a white person to gain acceptance. Looked down upon both of the cultures he/she supposedly belongs in.

My grandma(rest in peace) was of very white complexion which made it a lot easier for her to fit-in in a white man’s world. With the best intentions in the world she raised me like a rich white boy. I went to horse riding lessons, swimming lessons, the best private schools. I don’t regret any of it because it has made me who I am today.

So now to the bad words…the first and second name that appear on my birth certificate read Francisco Xavier. My dad’s name is Francisco and his dad the same and it goes on for several generations. I must admit my dad is whitewashed as well. Maybe not as much but he is. That’s probably because he is as dark as I am and skin color still plays a big part in today’s society. If you haven’t already noticed I am rambling on and on trying to stall the release of the name I so dread. My family decided to try and break the Francisco chain of Latin men and refer to me as Francis. There it is I said it FRANCIS! It would have been OK if that was my “at home” name but my parents decided to register me at school with the name Francis. You can only imagine the amount of bullying and name calling I had to deal with growing up.

As soon as I moved to Costa Rica I was able to drop that name and use Francisco. Since then I am known as Francisco or Frank for short. But every once in a while when i am around old and new friends , it never fails that someone refers to me as Francis and I get a couple of weird looks from new friends.

The only thing that distinguishes the name Francis as a male is the spelling. The female version of the name even though pronounced the same is spelled Frances. Hence the quote I started with:

“Boys are straight up and down and girls are round all around”

The whole reason I even bring this up today is because I found it quite ironic that the Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio took the Papal name of Pope Francis the I. I guess my “given name” is one of prestige and honor. Even more so now that it is considered a Papal name.

I’m glad I got this off my chest. Now the whole world knows my dirty secret :).


Can’t Change Me

Just won’t happen…


Don’t try to. Don’t ask me to. If I do, it’s because I chose to. NOT because that’s what you wanted.

I attract people who think they can change me. That I would be better off if I stayed out a little later, slept a little later, stopped cursing so much, ate a little differently, and so on.

If you’re trying to change me, you don’t really want me. Quit pretending you do. I won’t be molded in to your perfect, ideal woman. I’m perfect for someone, and that someone isn’t you.

I made it this long being this way. Don’t try to change me. Accept me for me, or walk on.

[Song Can’t Change Me by Chris Cornell / one of my absolute favorite songs]

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